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Sunday, March 30, 2014

Pigskin Stew: 49ers’ Chris Culliver hit and run and brass knuckles


By on 3/30/2014 04:00:00 PM

Welcome to Pigskin Stew, your weekly recap of injury related news around the NFL that you might have missed while you anxiously await the Season 4 finale of the greatest show on television, The Walking Dead.  It has been a tough season for our zombie-fighting heroes trying to survive in a post-apocalyptic undead world.  I am dying to see what happens.

It is a tasty, one ingredient stew this week containing brass, brass and more brass so sit back, relax, pour a generous helping of Bookers bourbon, neat and join me every Sunday afternoon up until the start of the 2014 preseason for your injury related news that flew under your radar. 



49ers’ Chris Culliver arrested on two felony counts, hit and run and brass knuckles

San Francisco 49ers cornerback Chris Culliver was arrested this week and charged with two felonies, one for a hit and run and one for possessing brass knuckles, yes, you read that correctly brass knuckles.

Culliver missed the entire 2013 season with a knee injury.  Culliver tore his anterior cruciate ligament in his left knee in a non-contact injury during practice last August.  Culliver started six games for San Francisco in 2012, racking up 47 tackles and 14 passes defended.

Now Culliver is in a pot of hot stew.  Here is the skinny.  Culliver allegedly hit a bicyclist and fled the scene of the accident, aka a hit and run (first mistake).  A brave Samaritan pursued the injured CB and somehow blocked Culliver's Ford Mustang and called the Five-0.

Before the Fuzz arrived, Culliver allegedly got out of his stang, threatened the Samaritan with brass knuckles (second mistake) and then got back in his pony, tried to jet and smashed up the Samaritan’s whip in the process (third mistake). 

The black and whites arrived and happily arrested Culliver without incident.  A search of Culliver's vehicle turned up the brass knuckles.

The 49ers have released a statement:
The 49ers organization is aware of the recent matter involving Chris Culliver.  We will remain in contact with Chris and the local authorities as we continue to gather the facts regarding this situation. As this is an ongoing legal matter, we will reserve further comment at this time.
Culliver was arrested for felony hit and run for striking the bicyclist, reckless driving causing an injury, felony possession of brass knuckles and misdemeanor hit and run for the striking the vehicle.

Culliver was booked into Santa Clara County Jail and made his $36,000 bail Friday evening.  Culliver is scheduled to appear in Santa Clara County Superior Court in San Jose on April 11.

Fortunately, the bicyclist was treated and released with minor injuries.

I would like to think that this was just an ordinary guy "freaking out" after he realized he hit someone and lost all common sense.  I tossed that out the window when Culliver time traveled back to 1979 and whipped out a pair of brass knuckles.  What in Niners Nation was he thinking?

Culliver would be in so much less trouble if he would have stopped, called for assistance and tried to help the person he just hit.

The 49ers’ statement was a generic one but they are a well-respected organization and praiseworthy.  If they discover through their investigation that Culliver just "lost it" under extreme stress and made bad mistake after bad mistake, I think they still keep him on the roster.

However, if there is any evidence to the contrary, the Niners should cut bait and hope they do not get a brass left hook in the process.


Check back next Sunday for another bowl of Pigskin Stew, until then stay thirsty my friends.


You can follow me on twitter @JAFOScottRyan

 

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